


How To Lose A Girl In Ten Seconds

by iPepsi



Category: iCarly
Genre: Angst, Friendship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2009-02-24
Updated: 2009-09-30
Packaged: 2013-08-08 02:21:06
Rating: T
Chapters: 9
Words: 6,297
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4883770/1/
Author URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/u/610359/iPepsi
Summary: Carly is confused about how she has been feeling lately. She never has been good at acting natural. CAM.





	1. Chapter 1

**How To Lose A Girl In Ten Seconds**

**Chapter One**

I cannot remember when it originally started because too much time has passed since the first time I found myself smiling when I woke up tangled with her body. And it's not anything like you're probably thinking because everything up until this point stayed relatively innocent for me. My best friend sleeps more nights at my place than at hers, making it much too ridiculous to shove her to the couch like a guest when my bed is a perfect fit for two people. That never occurred as a problem to anyone, including me, until recently.

Now, we're down in my kitchen chomping down bacon and sipping orange juice while we wait for Spencer to finish his shower so he can drive us to school. Sam's plate is empty much faster than mine, leading her to grab at what's left of my breakfast. Usually I would scold her lack of manners, but I'm finding myself in one of my new awkward trances again, flashing back to when we first woke up.

Sam's arms were wrapped around my midsection, except one of her hands had been angled up a little farther than it should have been. I had begun to ponder what would happen if it managed to creep up just a couple more centimeters when the alarm sounded and woke her up. She smelled what Spencer was cooking downstairs almost instantly and the embrace was broken while she excitedly hopped out of bed. I soon followed, pretending to be just as excited about getting downstairs to eat.

I have concluded that bacon is the only thing powerful enough to get Sam out of bed so quickly on a school day. Normally, she'll whimper in her half-asleep state, protesting waking up at all. I prefer those mornings because neither of us will move from whatever position we'd managed to end up in during the night, and the special feeling that began springing up not long ago will linger just a bit longer. Spencer banging on the door and insisting we will be late if we sleep any longer is the force that tends to interrupt it.

Speaking of my brother, he's out of the shower and scooting us towards the door. When we get outside and hop into his car I glance back at Sam briefly and notice she is eyeing me suspiciously. I want to ask her why, but I decide to wait until we reach the school to prevent involving Spencer in the conversation. The drive is short so I don't have to exercise too much patience. To my relief, Freddie is not around when we reach our lockers.

"Why were you looking at me so oddly earlier?"

"You let me eat half your breakfast without saying anything. You didn't try to steal any back either."

"Oh, well, I uh…have a lot on my mind?"

When it comes out more as a question than a statement I know I've lost all chances at avoiding more interrogation.

"Right. Who is it this time?"

"What? Why do you assume I'm distracted by a person?"

At least she would never guess that she herself is the person.

"We're sixteen. What else is supposed to distract us? Homework? As if."

I laugh half-heartedly. She had a point.

"Okay, you're right."

"Which guy is it this time? I know Jake isn't single again so…"

I stall while she closes her locker, trying to come up with someone random that won't hold consequence. Too bad my voice betrays me before my mind has time to catch up.

"It's Freddie."

The sound of hysterical laughter fills the hallway and a couple people passing through begin to stare.

"You actually like the dork? No way. You've turned that boy down more times than Gibby's taken his shirt off."

I look down nervously as Freddie happens to be arriving. I hope that Sam thinks my reaction is related to the arrival of my 'crush' and not an obvious attempt to hide a lie. Her fist makes contact with Freddie's left arm as I look on incredulously. Sure, she is violent, but the fist is typically reserved for the more serious offenses.

"Ow! What was that for?"

"For slipping some crazy pills into Carly's smoothie last night."

Sam walks away, leaving me alone to explain things to Freddie. This is one of the few situations where I really wonder why I am attracted to her instead of anyone else, a guy, Freddie? Yeah, I admit it, what I have been feeling lately is definitely some kind of forbidden attraction.

"Carly, what is Sam talking about?"

I want to lie, but it might be safer to tell the truth…or is it? Maybe I could go out with Freddie and learn to like him on a deeper level. If that happens, I won't have to worry about messing up things with Sam. Or it could screw things up way worse and make everyone more confused.

"I told her I don't think Jake is hot anymore."

At least there is some truth to that statement, just not in context.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

"I didn't think you were the type of girl to change her mind over a haircut."

"He got a haircut?"

As soon as I asked the question, I knew Freddie's suspicious level skyrocketed.

"You didn't notice?"

"No…"

"I hate to agree with Sam but…did you take crazy pills? Every girl in school has been talking about Jake's hair, meaning even the guys had to notice after overhearing so many comments."

Yep, I've blown it. He knows something is up. There's no way the alert Carly would be out of any loop.

"Maybe I…," I try to think of a lie but nothing useful comes to mind, "oh I give up. I'm kinda attracted to someone who I wasn't interested in before."

Freddie's face lights up.

"It's me, isn't it? You finally realized you want me?"

I let my head hit the locker behind me lightly as I motion to lean against it.

"Freddie…"

"Want to go to a movie tonight? I'll treat!"

Life might be easier for me if I say yes.

"Freddie," I say more firmly, "I do not want to date you."

Too bad I'm better at keeping things complicated.

"Oh, you mean you are just looking for something…physical?"

That's what I get for using the term 'attracted'. But I didn't know what else to call it. Sam has been my best friend for so long it's hard to judge whether my emotions are just friendly or go deeper.

I shake my head, finally, as the bell rings.

"It's not you Freddie. At all."

The disappointment on his face makes me feel guilty, but I have to get to class, so I leave and round the corner while he stays behind. I feel a sudden tug on my shirt as I am dragged into a dark room that I learn is one of the janitor's closets as the culprit flicks on a light switch.

"Sam?" I question, realizing who has 'kidnapped' me and wanting answers.

"You lied to me," she accuses.

"What? Is this about Freddie?"

"Yeah, I just heard you reject him again."

We both sit down on overturned buckets. I really should be in class because we are reviewing for a test, but I can't be opposed to additional quality time with Sam.

"And that comment about Jake…did you really mean it?"

Of course she had to hear that part too.

"I guess. I really had no idea about the haircut."

"Do you have an eating disorder? Get pregnant? Start smoking or drinking? Something is definitely up."

"None of the above."

I want to kiss a girl. That's the disorder. Except, I don't think I can actually tell her that even if she wouldn't be able to guess it was her right away.

"If you were telling the truth to Freddie about being interested in a new guy then why not just say so? We've never kept our crushes secret from each other before."

"I never said anything about there being a new guy…"

Shit. I really said that. I didn't mean to. But the need to defend myself kicked in and pounced.

When I look up to see her reaction her mouth is slightly hung open and her gaze shows clear confusion.

"You, You're…"

I have to cut her off before she mentions the 'G' word. It's not correct. I don't like girls. Just her.

"No, I'm not. That came out wrong."

She looks relieved, but still slightly troubled.

Bring on the shovels. This hole is getting bigger by the second.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

"Um, alright, so pretend it came out right. What's really up?"

I hear a new nervousness in her voice that wasn't there a minute ago. I am imagining myself backed into the corner by Sam, even though neither of us has actually budged, and that would be completely intimidating if it weren't for my mind wandering to the feel of her hands being used to pin me there by the wrists. I must be spacing out more than I thought because I hear her clear her throat.

"I really should get to class," I mumble softly, not sure what other strategy I have left to avoid the truth.

I feel myself standing up to leave, but Sam jumps up and stands in front of the door to block me.

"Carly, I'm worried about you. You wouldn't be lying to both of your best friends if there wasn't something seriously wrong."

It's very rare that I see Sam hurt, but I can tell from the look she is giving me now that she is bothered that I won't open up to her. If she keeps this up maybe it will be more damaging not to tell her anything than to confess. I sit myself back down, pondering, and Sam's muscles appear to relax a little even though she chooses to keep her stance beside the only exit.

"It's just hard to accept this, that the person who I find myself…wanting…is someone I'm not confident I could ever have."

"Every girl who's ever laid eyes on Jake Crandall has felt the same way, don't you think? There's gotta be another piece missing. Having a crush on someone clearly unattainable hasn't stopped us from daydreaming together before."

This is it. There's nowhere to run. The sooner I shock her the sooner she'll get over it, right? I walk up to her slowly, testing her reaction with each step. When I am directly in front of her, as close as I can get without our bodies touching, she wraps her left hand around the door handle protectively and leans against the door a bit stronger.

Our eyes are connected in some type of silent duel at this point. The only way to get out would be to physically move her, and we both know I'm either incapable of achieving this or just wouldn't ever attempt it. Violence is her thing, not mine. Although what I am planning to do is an attack of sorts. No fists necessary, just lips.

Neither of us is moving and it feels like a waste of time, so I take one last quiet breath and go for it. In the process of avoiding her nose, my mouth ends up half touching her left cheek, but the other half that reaches the destination succeeds in leaving her stunned and me scared. Not the kind of scared where you scream, but the kind where you hit a realization about something that was only a suspicion before.

We're apart now and Sam still isn't making any motion at all, so I say the only thing I can think of, something that would lighten the mood if this didn't feel too serious to turn into a joke.

"So, I guess that wasn't the correct password…"

Sam shifts herself out of my path and lets go of the door handle that probably left an imprint on her hand from how hard I saw her gripping it after the kiss.

"N, No b, but you can go anyway."

It sounds like a suggestion, but it probably should be taken as a command. I'm not sure what I would say to her if I stick around anyway. My lips have already expressed themselves enough for one day.


	4. Intermission

**Intermission Chapter**

I hide out in one of the bathroom stalls for the remainder of first period because being this late would cause an unnecessary scene. Somebody in the class has to be taking notes that I can borrow so I won't fail. Part of me is tempted to skip the rest of the day, suspecting Sam has already taken off to do exactly that. But they'll notice I'm gone and Spencer will find out.

Sometimes I wonder if being carefree like Sam is a more rewarding feeling than having a report card full of A's. There's still a chance to go to college with grades like Sam's, so I don't have to trade in a successful future in order to find out how it feels to be somewhere like the mall while my peers are being tortured by Miss Briggs. That's not where I'd go if I left now though. I'm not sure there's anywhere apart from the loft that seems like the ideal place to be at the moment.

When the bell sounds to signal passing period, I walk out into the hall and go straight to my locker. I find myself pouring all the books I had grabbed earlier back into it. My feet begin carrying me towards the front door and I end up completely ignoring Freddie, who calls my name questioningly as I pass him on my way out. Destination: either search for Sam or search for my mind, because right now I'm pretty sure both are lost.

AN: This is basically just a drabble between chapters. It's capturing a little bit of Carly's inner thoughts directly after the previous chapter's events before everything jumps forward in the next chapter.


	5. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

I climb the stairs up to the loft once I reach Bushwell Plaza. At first I had walked in the direction of Sam's place, but I thought better of it. The chances of her being there were low and it's raining outside, a good way to catch a cold considering I didn't bring a decent jacket with me. So here I am, turning the corner before I reach the front door to the loft, and there's a figure leaning against the wall beside it.

I freeze as I recognize her. Sam turns her head from the direction she was originally staring and our eyes meet briefly. But then she looks away again and I'm still not sure whether I should turn around and go back to school or walk around her and go inside alone. Well, there's also the option to talk to her I guess. It's just too awkward.

"Spencer isn't home," Sam mumbles as I take a step towards the door.

That almost explains why she is sitting out in our hallway. Except the fact that she can pick locks or locate our spare key effortlessly. It's obviously a sign that our relationship is changing if she isn't invading the loft shamelessly without invitation.

"You wanna…come inside?" I ask nervously while taking out my key.

"Nowhere else to go. Mom has company."

I nod my head in understanding as I push the door open, and I feel Sam follow me inside. She falls back on the couch and I hear the TV click on from behind me as I proceed to drop my keys on the kitchen counter. It's the most characteristic thing Sam has done, sending some relief through me.

I tentatively sit down on the other end of the couch and glance at the girly cow rerun that happens to be playing. Having an entire cushion between us is definitely unusual. We have to talk soon. This isn't going to work for me, this distance and silence. I scoot over casually until I am close enough to yank the remote from her hand. When I grab it and turn the television off she doesn't take her eyes off the black screen.

"I was watching that," she finally says, looking at me with a disappointed gaze.

We've watched the same episode together at least six times so there's no reason for her to actually be disappointed aside from the fact that turning it off forces us to have a conversation.

"I'm sorry," I explain sincerely.

"You should be. It's rude to interrupt someone's entertainment like that."

"Not for that. I meant about this morning. Lying to you…"

"Now that I know the truth, I think your lies were better."

She isn't looking at me when she says the last words. It's a good thing she wasn't though because I know the pain that flashed through me as soon as she said them is clearly visible on my face. I want to be angry at her, but I'm too busy cursing myself. This is my fault.

"It won't happen again," I attempt to promise, but it comes out more like a plea.

In the process of pleading with her I unintentional scoot much closer. She jumps up from the couch, shaking her head and walking towards the door.

"Coming here was a mistake. I should have just crashed whatever company my mom has."

"Please, Sam…"

Sam turns around slightly as a couple tears visibly fall down my face. Her mouth is curved downward into a frown and I look at the ground disgracefully. She turns and leaves without saying another word. I am now feeling as pathetic as I know I must look.


	6. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

I am still curled up pathetically on the couch when Spencer arrives home shortly after one o'clock. The television is turned off because I've just been staring at the wall for the past couple of hours. He has some groceries in one arm and some parts from the junk yard in the other. His surprise upon seeing me is evident, but he puts everything away before grilling me about it.

"Carly, what's wrong? Why aren't you at school? Well, you don't look like you are feeling well, but I thought they needed me to come pick you up from the nurse in order to excuse you from classes?"

I push myself up so I am in a sitting position, clearing space for Spencer to sit down on the couch.

"I didn't go to the nurse. I just left," I reply honestly, without even giving a second thought to lying about it.

"Did something happen that you can talk to me about? You've never skipped before. I'm worried now."

Opening up to Spencer scares me. I don't know of any better options though. I'm going to need somebody to talk it out with. It's hard deciding what details I'm willing to give…if I can tell him everything or if I should censor the parts that frighten me the most. I shouldn't be afraid of someone as open minded as my brother. There's no one I can trust better than family right now.

"It only took ten seconds, if it was even that long. Compared to the years it took to build everything, it was actually possible to destroy it that quickly."

My eyes are moving around the room casually, as if I'm searching for something particular, but my head doesn't move. What I'm really concentrating on is the kiss, trying to bring back the moment and time it precisely. Yet it's so insignificant to reach perfection on the estimate. Deciding whether it lasted 3.4 seconds or 15.7 seconds isn't going to change the aftermath.

"Does this have to do with Sam? You two left here seeming fine this morning…"

"Everything would still be fine if I could have lied more guiltlessly or changed the truth."

I begin to tap my fingers against my lap slowly, growing more nervous. Spencer apparently notices this, so he reaches out to grab my hand to pause the motion. He lets go and I let my arm slide to the right so it's laying stationary by my side. I still fiddle slightly, but less obviously, as my index finger brushes the cushion.

"What is it that you lied, or didn't lie, about?"

And of course he asks the question that most directly leads to the dreaded answer. I don't know how to explain. I can't 'come out' and tell him I'm lesbian, bisexual, or whatever other label might correspond to the way I feel about Sam. Not because I'm ruling anything out, but because there's not enough evidence to support such a hypothesis since I have failed to conduct a valid experiment. I know how I felt after kissing her, but there is a lack of variables to prove I wouldn't feel the same way kissing any other person.

"I lied about liking Freddie. I turned him down for a date after I just got done telling her I was interested in him, and she overheard," I start simply, leaving out the deeper issue.

Spencer looks at me puzzled. I can understand why. It doesn't really make much sense for Sam and I to fight over Freddie.

"Why would you tell Sam you like Freddie if you don't?"

"To cover up the truth before I gave it away."

"Are you two interested in the same guy again?"

If only. That fight was more amusing than it was serious. We bounced back from the competition without actually ruining our friendship it seemed. Much better than the conflict we've fell into now.

"No. There's um…no guy involved at all?"

I don't know why it comes out like a question when it's obviously meant to be a statement. The likelihood of him thinking it means the root of our problem isn't clearly identified is slim to none. I wouldn't think I lost Sam forever if there wasn't a known problem that shook up our relationship.

"You don't have to explain anything else if you don't want to. If you need more time to think about it…"

"I kissed Sam," I confess, cutting Spencer off.

He is speechless and I notice him blinking a little unnaturally. It feels good to have the real problem out in the open even if Spencer doesn't know how to handle it or give advice.

"I didn't know you liked…you've dated boys."

"I don't think gender has anything to do with it. Sam just makes me feel…different."

Different. Great. That's so descriptive.

"I think she needs time, Carly. Try to see it from her side. If you thought everything was normal, then one day she had decided to kiss you…"

"I would have tried to talk to her and understand why she did it."

"Is that what you really believe you would have done?"

"No, I guess that's how I wish it was. But really, it's hard to talk it out at all. It'd be easier to forget it happened."

"Eventually, Sam will be ready to see you again. I've seen how strong your friendship has been. You'll both figure out how to work through this."

I know Spencer is being sincere and I want to believe him. Sam will speak to me again when she has an idea of what to say. Until then, I must prepare myself for whatever solution she comes up with. And now, I have surrendered my fate to the hands of a ham lover.


	7. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six**

A week of iCarly was skipped as I gave Sam her space. Freddie still doesn't know why we're separating ourselves. I told him it was a 'disagreement' and he'd know more if and/or when the time was right. The answer didn't satisfy him, but if he brought it up I changed the subject.

Spencer keeps inviting me to help him with his sculptures. Not that he hasn't before, just now he seems to go out of his way to include me as a distraction from what he knows is on my mind otherwise.

Freddie came by earlier to tell me Sam e-mailed him about showing up for the iCarly we're supposed to do tomorrow. He said he has to get back to me about whether she's willing to rehearse first. I don't know if it's meant to be like business now, her participation in iCarly, or if this is a sign she is prepared to re-enter my life personally as well.

I hear a tapping against the front door and see a twist of the handle as Freddie lets himself in.

"Sam should be here in half an hour," he declares, joining me on the couch.

"What did she say, exactly, in her message about doing iCarly again?"

"Not a whole lot. Just mentioned coming back…"

"Are we going to rehearse what we planned for last week or come up with something new?"

"Let's ask Sam if she is still up for it. Jell-O Wrestling Trivia may not be the best choice while you two are fighting."

"We're not fighting, Freddie. We're just taking a break from each other."

At least, that's how I'd describe it now. We never argued or anything. Not really.

"Guess the breaks over then," Freddie replies as we hear a twist of the door handle.

"She's early," I whisper.

Freddie merely shrugs, unaffected.

I haven't looked in that direction since I heard the door click shut again. Could her decision to let herself in without invite be a good sign? I still don't know what will happen when our eyes meet, so I focus my attention in front of me. When her form passes by my line of vision I remain still. The sound of her footsteps continues lightly on the floor until I'm positive she's in the kitchen. I force myself to look.

"I'm going to go upstairs and check all the equipment," Freddie alerts me as he leaves the spot beside me to climb the stairs.

I want to beg him to stay, but he doesn't turn around to view my slightly panicked face. I can't shout out to him or Sam will hear. He may or may not have chosen to leave us alone on purpose.

"Ah, ham, how I've missed thee…"

I peek in the direction of the sound just in time to witness Sam attacking our meat with a fork. It causes me to smile to myself. It is a relief to see her so in character compared to how I've known her to be for all these years. But does this mean we're going to pretend nothing happened? I suppose I'll have to test it.

"I don't know why we haven't done a segment yet called 'Sam loves ham' and just filmed you raiding my fridge…"

I am up from the couch now and standing on the opposite side of the counter. She looks up from her feast and sets the fork down while swallowing what's left in her mouth.

"Maybe because I always eat it before the show, like during rehearsals, so there isn't any left when we film."

My eyes only capture a flash of hers before they move away to concentrate on the plate. There's nowhere obvious to take our conversation.

"Freddie is probably done checking things. Want to head upstairs?"

I turn around to walk away, not intending to wait for a response, but her voice stops me.

"Hey Carly, can I spend the night?"

For a question so familiar, it's weird how much it is able to surprise me. I turn my head slightly and nod, not sure what else to do. She then starts to follow me as we ascend the stairs to the third floor.

The entire rehearsal is a blur. I must have concealed how much my mind is swirling though because Freddie still complimented us regularly. He's currently getting ready to leave. I'm standing in the middle of the room. Sam has exhaustedly crashed upon a bean bag. And it's a mystery how such a routine physical existence can become so unnatural in the midst of emotional chaos.


	8. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

I tentatively sit on the bean bag opposite Sam's after Freddie is out of sight.

"Thanks for letting me stay," Sam comments, breaking what could have potentially been a much longer silence.

She doesn't usually show gratitude for being allowed to eat our food or take up one of my pillows. It's tough to tell if I should take it as sincere manners or a conversation initiator.

"You know you're always welcome here," I reply, stating what has been obvious, but unspoken until now.

"Is Spencer cooking dinner tonight?"

I look over and notice Sam's expression is hopeful. I frown and shake my head. Her face drops.

"He's on a date," I explain softly.

It feels awkward and uncomfortably mentioning Spencer's date because it locks in a forbidden subject between us. Not the part about Spencer going out, Sam has always kept track of his girlfriends better than I have. Just the date part is an unsettling topic.

"Maybe we could go ou…go somewhere and pick up something," Sam suggests, altering her words mid-sentence.

I know why she didn't like her original choice of words. They would be almost suggestive after recent events. She could have still said it. It's not like I'm going to get the wrong impression.

"Is that what you'd prefer to do? We could order pizza to be delivered instead."

I can't decide whether going out or staying in will turn out more awkward for us. If I let her have the overall choice then I'll feel like I have less blame for whatever happens. Now that I think of it, that seems kind of selfish. Haven't I initiated enough already though?

"How about Chinese? Their delivery boys are always more fun to mess with."

The familiar mischievous smirk that appears on her face causes me to roll my eyes habitually.

"Sure, but there isn't any blue water in the toilet anymore. If we get the same guy as last time he may be disappointed."

"I don't think that man would come back if he had a choice."

"Yeah, probably not. We're gonna have to go downstairs to order it. I left my cell beside the computer."

"We could have used my phone, except the battery died a while ago. I left it on all week and forgot about charging it because there haven't been any calls or texts to answer."

Sam's two main contacts are me and her mom. If she was at her house all week, her mom would have no need to call. And of course we weren't communicating. We'd all save tons of money on cell phone bills if we holed up as social outcasts. Sam doesn't need to be an outcast. She has me.

"Let's go then. I know your stomach doesn't like to be kept waiting."

Surprisingly, the food only takes twenty minutes to be delivered. When it arrives we are watching yesterday's episode of Seattle Beat that I had recorded to my TiVo. By the time to show is over Sam has finished her portion of the food. Like usual, I have taken my time and still have some noodles left. I silently hand the box over that is still one-fourth full. She smiles and hands it back.

"What? You aren't going to eat my leftovers?"

Sam shakes her head and I raise an eyebrow. She browses the channels on the television and pauses on a movie that I don't recognize. Her focus seems to be drawn into it as I continue eating, holding back the urge to dig farther into the matter of her surrender of food-hoarding habits.

"How long had you wanted to kiss me?" Sam asks suddenly.

"Wha…huh?" I reply, dumbfounded.

Was she really deep in thought this whole time while I believed she was concentrating on the TV?

"Was it a week? A month? A year…"

I'm scared to estimate, but she seems serious about getting an answer.

"Months."

"How many?"

"A few?"

When my answer comes out more as a question, she looks at me skeptically.

"You can't remember?"

"Sorry I didn't pencil in 'day I started thinking about my best friend inappropriately' on my calendar."

My sarcasm comes out too harsh and I'm afraid she'll leave again. But she doesn't move or show any sign of anger. Maybe Sam finally realizes that the control I have over my own frustration has become virtually non-existent. Is there a catalyst powerful enough to keep this friendship boat afloat?


	9. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight**

Sam puts the conversation on pause for at least forty five minutes before the credits role for the movie I think we were both only pretending to watch. When she picks up the remote I expect her to search for another movie, but instead the power to the television is clicked off.

"Do you want to put one of my movies in?" I ask casually, not sure what she wants to do because it's too early to sleep.

She shakes her head and sets the remote down.

"Can we fix this?"

I turn my head and our eyes meet.

"What exactly is broken, in your opinion?"

I'm really curious to know what's been going on in her mind.

"I dunno. Being mad at you for lying to me made sense. Ending our friendship over honesty doesn't."

"Whatever I can do to make you feel comfortable around me again…" I trail off, wanting to know if she already had solutions in mind.

"You don't make me that uncomfortable. Being trapped in janitor's storage is a fair excuse to attack someone's lips. I trust you in public."

We both laugh awkwardly.

"The loft isn't public," I find myself pointing out before giving much thought to how it could be received.

I look away, embarrassed. There's a good chance that comment will be taken the wrong way, but maybe we've made enough progress that I can get away with it.

"Tell that to the people who like to barge in here without warning on a regular basis," she replies, apparently unaffected by the tension that could have built up.

"You're the only one who never knocks besides Spencer," I accuse.

"I wouldn't say never…" she reasons with a grin.

I respond with one of those 'come on, yeah right' type of looks. She surrenders.

"Alright, you win. I fail at having manners. It's just, this feels more like home than when I'm with my mom."

I see her lips tilt into a slight frown, signaling that she is ashamed of the confession. I instinctively reach out and place my hand over hers, the left one that is lying limp off to her side. Surprisingly, she lets me keep it there.

"Trust me; I'm just as used to having you here as you are to being here. It must have been awkward for you to be home for over a week. What did you mom think?"

"She asked if you moved…or kicked the bucket. I made up some lie about Spencer putting on an art show here and how all the food had to be saved for the guests. Speaking of…what did you tell him when he noticed I wasn't around?"

Uh oh. I told Spencer what happened. He knew why she was gone the whole time. She expected me to make something up? Please don't get mad…

"Uhm, I kinda mentioned the kiss to him when he caught me out of school early."

She looks shocked rather than angry.

"You really told him?"

"Yeah, I'm sorry. He took it well, said he knew we'd work it out. And here we are…"

"So this whole…thing…whatever it is that you've been feeling. Is it more like the Jake Crandall lust or Freddie's obsessive crush?"

Please stand by while I grab the 'How to Answer Questions You Never Expect Your Best Friend to Ask for Dummies' book.


End file.
